Some Singapore parents are choosing to step away from the intense competition surrounding academic results, tuition classes and prestigious schools, prioritising their children’s happiness, personal interests and overall development instead.
For homemaker Liang May, that meant taking her son on a hotel staycation during his study break before the Primary School Leaving Examination (PSLE) in 2024. They went rock climbing, played arcade games and visited cafes, fitting in study sessions along the way.
The 44-year-old said the experience helped her son relax when he was feeling stressed about the national examination.
While some parents restrict their children’s screen time and play during exam periods, Liang increased her son’s gaming time to ensure he had enough rest alongside his studies.
She also chose a neighbourhood primary school for him instead of taking advantage of an opportunity to enrol him earlier in her husband’s former school, a prestigious boys’ institution.
Liang wanted her children to meet people from different backgrounds and develop a broader perspective. She said her children thrived at Pei Tong Primary School, where they formed lasting friendships and benefited from supportive teachers.
Her approach to learning also extended to her daughter. When the girl struggled to recite the alphabet in Primary 2, Liang continued reading with her and bringing her to the library rather than immediately signing her up for tuition. Her daughter has since represented her primary school in a creative writing competition.
Liang said the experience reinforced her belief that children benefit from discovering their abilities at their own pace.
Focusing on Learning Rather Than School Prestige
Liang is among a growing number of parents who are resisting the pressure to enrol their children in multiple enrichment programmes or pursue admission to highly sought-after schools.
A 2026 study by Singapore’s Institute of Policy Studies found that parents increasingly value holistic development, even as more report feeling anxious about their children’s future prospects and the possibility of falling behind.
More than two-thirds of parents surveyed viewed Singapore’s education system as one of the best in the world but said it still caused their children unnecessary stress.
Another parent, identified as Tang, said she does not set specific grade targets for her children. Instead, she focuses on whether they understand their lessons and put reasonable effort into their studies.
Her son gained admission to the School of Science and Technology through the Direct School Admission (DSA) route. Her 11-year-old daughter is due to sit the PSLE in 2027.
For her daughter’s secondary school placement, Tang plans to consider her results and co-curricular activity preferences rather than pursue one particular institution at all costs.
National Institute of Education professor Jason Tan noted that there is limited rigorous local research establishing how strongly attending a so-called good school determines a person’s later success.
He said questions remain about how much of the perceived advantage enjoyed by students from top schools comes from school programmes and how much reflects advantages they already had.
Building Skills Beyond the Classroom
Other parents are directing their resources towards interests and practical skills instead of concentrating solely on academic performance.
Former secondary school teacher Jasmine Sia, 41, who is now a private tutor, tailors her approach to her four children according to their individual strengths.
Rather than expecting all of them to meet the same academic standards, she chooses activities that may develop into lifelong interests. Her children take piano, wushu, robotics and football classes.
Marketing executive Yong Qiao Qing, 39, takes a different approach with her daughters, aged six and 10. She involves them in her online business, Little Warriors, which produces protective clothing for children with sensitive skin.
The girls help brainstorm ideas, create social media content, set up booths and interact with customers. Yong said the experience teaches them about financial skills, entrepreneurship, communication and presenting ideas.
For single mother Shoba Agnetha Seetaram, 46, emotional well-being takes priority over academic achievement.
Her 16-year-old daughter began experiencing social anxiety in Primary 5 during the Covid-19 pandemic. The condition led to physical symptoms, including severe headaches, hospitalisations and difficulties attending school.
After missing much of Secondary 2 and Secondary 3, the teenager is repeating Secondary 3. Her mother said she has prioritised her daughter’s emotional stability, with the teenager receiving professional support and taking medication for anxiety.
Shoba said she is more concerned about the people her children become than their academic results.
Parents Still Worry About Falling Behind
Despite their intentions, some parents acknowledge that resisting academic competition can be difficult when conversations about school admissions, tuition and enrichment programmes are common.
Marketing consultant Vanessa Ng, 38, who has children aged four and one, said she sometimes wonders whether she is doing enough when other parents discuss strategies for securing places in popular schools.
For now, she limits her older child’s enrichment activities to no more than one class each term, usually involving creative or language-based learning.
Ng hopes to avoid allowing disappointing examination results to define her children’s sense of self-worth. However, she also recognises that her approach could become harder to maintain once her son enters primary school and she can see how he compares with his peers.
The experiences of these families highlight a dilemma facing parents in Singapore: many want their children to enjoy a balanced childhood, but fear that stepping back from competition could leave them at a disadvantage.
For these parents, the challenge is finding a balance between preparing children for future opportunities and giving them the space to grow, explore their interests and develop at their own pace.
